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Posts Tagged ‘Happiness’

Think about it … every single thing we do is intended to make us happier., at the root of every goal we want to reach is happiness.

And yet sometimes we get diverted and do things that actually move us away from this goal.

We all have the potential for genuine happiness. There is no gene or DNA marker that determines who will be happy and who will not. We make choices throughout our lives and the result of all these choices combined determines our level of happiness. Make the right choices and happiness can be yours.

Here are just a sampling of some of the tactics you can employ in an 11-point roadmap to help guide you toward genuine happiness:

1. Look For The Positive In Everything:

There is an old saying that nothing is inherently good or bad, what makes it one or the other is merely your reaction to it. Find the positive and you will be happier. Those who soar against all odds do so because they look at the positive that could come out of their situation how ever bad it may seem to others.

2. Accentuate The Positive:

We all grow up with a “positivity imbalance”, the result of society’s norms and rules being based on restriction and punishment more than approval and reward. From a young age we are taught what we must not do instead of what we may do. Even in day-to-day life there are more negative influence that positive.

Luckily you can work to improve the balance. Celebrate the positive and work to get more of it. When you achieve something, congratulate yourself! Look for things you find uplifting, that make you happy. Get more of that! At the same time, reduce your exposure to negative input whether it is the daily news or people you don’t feel good around. You know your buttons, make sure the positive ones are pushed more than the negative.

3. Practice Good Selfishness:

When we were young we were taught that putting our interests before those of others is wrong. This is particularly true for women, many of whom sacrifice their dreams and ambitions to help others achieve theirs.

It is also common in the corporate world where the good of the company is considered more important than the good of the individual. It is good to help others, yet we should have boundaries to protect ourselves from being manipulated or abused by others.

You are important, and if you don’t look after yourself mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually, you cannot expect anyone else to do so.

4. Listen To Your Feelings:

All feelings are good. Every feeling occurs for a reason: it is delivering a message. Sometimes that message is pleasant, other times not. Our tendency is to distract ourselves from unpleasant feelings, often through smoking, drinking or drugs of one kind or another. When you feel bad, avoid distracting yourself, and identify the reason—there is some need not being met.

5. Give Of Yourself:

The more you give, the more you receive. There is probably no scientific study proving this to be so, but unconditional giving is hugely rewarding. It seems that the more of yourself you give, the greater the thrill and uplifting effect on your psyche. Help the needy, give time if you can, give anonymously, even if you lose the tax deduction!

6. Make It Happen:

You have the ability to make things happen using your mind. Top sports stars, and business people use it, and so can you. There are many ways of doing this; one of the common methods is to use visualization — getting a picture in your mind of whatever it is that you want to happen. It does not actually have to be a visual picture, it could be a feeling, a smell, a sound or any combination of the senses. Imagine finding the perfect parking near the entrance as you arrive at the supermarket or mall … the sky is the limit, but persevere! We are not used to utilizing this tool, so it takes practice.

7. Accept The Things You Cannot Change:

Change is a constant throughout life yet sometimes we resist things we don’t like and often expend a tremendous amount of energy on this resistance. Whilst this can be good and has resulted in tremendous advances through history, we should work to understand those things we cannot change and then move on.

Rather use the saved energy on something more worthwhile and productive. This is not to say that you should complacently accept anything. If you truly desire change, you should work towards that change; but spending time worrying about something without actively working to change it is unproductive and damaging to your wellbeing.

8. Take Responsibility For Your Choices:

Everything that you do, or don’t do, is because of choices you make or don’t make. It is easier and convenient to blame outside causes for things that go wrong in life but your life is the sum of all the choices you make along the way. Sometimes that choice is to let somebody else make a choice on your behalf. It may be scary to take responsibility for what happens in your life but it is really quite liberating because instead of seeing yourself as an effect of outside forces, you realize you are the cause of everything good you achieve.

Don’t abdicate responsibility for your life.

9. Schedule Regular “Self Time”:

Spend some time analyzing where you are in life, your strengths and weaknesses. How can you turn the latter into the former? Think about your views on everything from your job to global warming and the existence of aliens, then work out why you feel the way you do. Is your reasoning sound? The better you understand yourself, the better you understand the world.

10. Make Time To Meditate:

We spend almost all our time thinking of the past or planning for the future yet we are only ever here and now. We seldom spend time in the present. It has reached a point where, for most of us, it seems impossible to keep our focus on what is happening right now. Your meditation could be formal meditation or prayer, but it could be as simple as merely focusing on each breath as it goes in and out for five or ten minutes, dismissing past and future thoughts as they arise and they will!

11. Remove Your Limitations:

When we fail, usually the reason is simply because we don’t believe we are able or worthy of whatever it is that we fail to achieve. Most often, this belief is actually false; the result of negative programming received since childhood. The truth is that most of us are able to do most of what we really want to do, you just have to believe. The best way to start is with small things, working your way up as you notice the limits dissolving.

The more successful you are at assimilating the concepts and processes described in these eleven points into your life, the more genuinely happy you will be, and the happiness will last!

How would you know for certain that a person wants to take steps to better themselves? This question has no definitive answer because it depends greatly on the individual.

Many people have goals, and dreams but have no idea how to reach them. There are those who have some idea on how they might improve themselves and these are the ones that believe that if their job was better and if they’d encountered better opportunities along the way or fallen in love or all kind of other factors things would be just fine and they would be happy.

These people feel their happiness or lack of happiness is decided by external factors so whatever they do doesn’t really matter.

There are people who believe that if they had more money then they could easily obtain the things they want and be well on their way. They may have spent some time considering the things they want out of life and refuse to believe there’s anything they can do to reach their version of utopia other than scratching lottery ticket after lottery ticket.

Other people do not even know what they actually want from their lives and don’t actually know what would really makes them happy. They seem to just drift year to year, and fail to do much more than survive. They may seem to have more secure jobs and might be comfortable and seem to be happy enough but they don’t wish to achieve anything more from their lives than what they have.

Is self betterment fundamental?

Through our entire lives were are always growing, circumstances make us grow and develop, and it happens even if we don’t make the choice ourselves. Up to a certain age, we receive a formal education and we keep learning through experiences for the rest of our lives. We have to learn and grow to deal with all the things that life throws in our path.

Today life moves at a faster pace than it ever has throughout the history of mankind so for anyone living in modern society there are many more chances to do things with your life than ever before.

But, there is also more competition than ever before, and with technology constantly developing means that there really are few, if any, ‘jobs for life’ any longer. It’s now commonplace not only to change jobs several times in the course of our lives but even to switch occupations and industries.

Because the workplace is so competitive, those who crave success know they need to learn new skills and knowledge to be better than others and to do that, they must improve.

These are the people who will stay in their jobs or make progress in their field or that will be readily employable in several different fields or industries. A commitment to self improvement along with personal growth may well decide how anyone’s future will turn out.

The Self-Improvement Handbook

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The Art And Science Of Success Distilled Into One Simple But Powerful Life-Changing Guide!

Ever notice that in almost every level or circle of the society involves and preaches element of self-improvement? You can see this being practiced not only by leaders and entrepreneurs but also corporates, managers, executives, small business owners, and even teachers.

The one constant fact is that you have to continuously improve and change yourself throughout time especially if you want to achieve more, may it be in your career or life.

The Self-Improvement Handbook is peppered with inspirational quotes, motivation and even a 7-day guide you can use for your own!

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This is a wonderful book for strengthening our effective individual leadership skills through self-confrontation, self-discovery, and self-authenticity. Leaders and leadership are concepts that we deal with in many areas. In the global setting, we’re aware of different types of political systems, each with its own kind of leader/leaders. The corporate world, school systems, and families are all governed by leaders. Some we recognize as able and effective leaders, and others we might view as monsters. Recognizing that leadership is basic to life and that we’re all involved either as leaders or followers, our happiness depends on how well we understand the playing field. The author addresses the topic from several perspectives. The introduction tells us immediately that we’re complex persons with many facets to our person and we need courage and openness to explore who we really are. The author tells us that “A call to self-authenticity is not a call for perfection but a call for self-discovery and growth toward identifying with your essence.” He explains the terms of self and leadership. He chooses to view personality as the distinctive traits or characteristics of mind and behavior that distinguishes a person enduring over time. These characteristics include genetic traits and qualities, the person’s nurture and the choices made from nurture influences. Then to set the stage for his major premises he gives an expose of “Leadership Theories” with their implications. Interconnections are made with ideologies and approaches to leadership. Since much of what Patrick has to say is based on an understanding of personality characteristics, he relies on the enneagram to help the reader understand himself/herself and the different ways others may look at issues depending on their own nature, nurture, and experience. Since leadership does not depend only on the leader but also on the followers, an insight into all personalities is necessary. This is done very well using a link to the Enneagram Institute web site. Those not already versed in the enneagram can easily become familiar with it and the major personality types it proposes. The inclusion of a spiritual dimension to the person adds components sometimes overlooked. Several definitions are given for the word spirit. All point to an intangible quality within the person. It is the essence that makes the person or group who they are and gives them meaning. This brings the reader right back to “a call to self-discovery and growth identifying with our essence.” I think this is really a wonderful book. Following its invitation, one can gradually open oneself layer by layer, thus increasing one’s authenticity. In my opinion, Patrick has accomplished his purpose. Colleen T. Fogarty, OP, PhD

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